6 Reasons You’re Not Getting a Second Date

sad woman holding a phone

A successful first date often leads to a second, but not always. This can make you feel frustrated and even a little bit angry. After all, you thought things were going well! So why didn’t they call you back? If you’re wondering why you didn’t get a second date after what seemed like a great first date, read for some possible explanations.

You came on too strong

Most people know it’s essential to make an excellent first impression when dating. However, some people take this advice a bit too literally and wind up coming on too strong, which can be a major turn-off. If you’re wondering why you didn’t get a second date, it could be because you were too eager and came on too strong. While it’s great to be confident, remember that there is such a thing as being too forward. If you’re bragging about your accomplishments or trying too hard to impress your date, they’ll likely feel overwhelmed and want to end the date early. On the other hand, if you focus on getting to know your date and making them feel comfortable, you’re much more likely to score a second date.

You were too closed off

When it comes to dating, being open and honest with your date is essential. Sharing personal information and stories is a great way to get to know someone better and build rapport. However, there is such a thing as being too closed off. You may come across as uninterested, unengaged, or even arrogant if you’re not careful. Here are a few ways to avoid coming across as closed off on a first date:

  • Make eye contact and smile.
  • Try not to dominate the conversation.
  • Don’t be afraid to show vulnerability.

If you’re closed off on a first date, your date will likely pick up on it and lose interest. On the other hand, if you’re open and engaging, you’re much more likely to score a second date.

You’re not compatible

One of the most common reasons why people don’t get a second date is because they’re simply not compatible with the other person. This can be for various reasons, from differing interests to different outlooks on life. Compatibility is essential for a relationship to work. If there’s no compatibility, then it’s likely that the relationship will fizzle out eventually.

If this is always the reason why your dates don’t call you back, it’s probably time to consider dating services. Professional matchmakers can help you find dates that are more compatible with you, which increases your chances of getting a second date. They review your interests and preferences and then match you with potential dates that share your values and outlook on life. This can save you time and frustration, increasing your chances of finding a compatible partner.

They were only interested in a physical relationship

As sad as it may seem, some people are only interested in a physical relationship. If this is the case, they will likely not call you back after the first date because they’ve gotten what they wanted.

Of course, there’s nothing wrong with being interested in a physical relationship. However, if you’re looking for something more long-term, it’s essential to be upfront about it on the first date. Let your date know that you’re interested in getting to know them better and that you’re not just looking for a one-night stand. If they’re only interested in a physical relationship, they’ll probably lose interest when they realize that you’re not on the same page.

You talked about yourself the whole time

While sharing some information about yourself is normal, you don’t want to make the mistake of talking about yourself the whole time. If you’re not careful, you may come across as self-centered or even narcissistic. Instead of talking about yourself, focus on getting to know your date. Ask them questions about their life, their interests, and their goals. Show genuine interest in their answers, and try to find common ground. If you try to get to know your date, they’re much more likely to be interested in getting to know you better.

uninterested woman with her date

You talked about controversial topics

Talking about controversial topics on a first date is usually a bad idea. Unless you’re both on the same page about the issue, it’s likely to cause an argument. And even if you are on the same page, discussing topics such as politics or religion on a first date can still be a bit of a downer.

There are some exceptions to this rule, but you should generally avoid discussing controversial topics on a first date. Stick to lighter subjects like your favorite TV shows, movies, or books. Save the heavy stuff for later down the road.

The bottom line

Getting a second date is not always easy. However, keeping these tips in mind will increase your chances of getting that coveted second date. Just relax and be yourself, and don’t be afraid to show your interest in the other person. With a little effort, you’re sure to score a second date in no time.

Editor-in-chief of M’Lady Records. Loves to laugh, lives to love.

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